Because He Reminds Me of My Father

If you ever wonder why I’m willing to ride a roller coaster of emotion with him, well here’s some clues.

Throughout my school years (up until I’m in the fifth form), I have this belief towards committing into relationship; I don’t need one. I have my daddy. I have my mommy. And I have my sisters to annoy and my friends to hang out with. That’s it. That is all I ever need.

Then, when I am about to enter my matriculation college, my dad sent me off with one very powerful advice, A man who loves a woman will ask for her hands in marriage. Other than that, it is not more than just another version of bullseeet.

And me, being a very obedient daughter as always, believe his words. In fact, I still do believe in that. My principles are written around those words. So, what have changed, you may ask?

I met a vast types of guys as I grow up. And although I try my best not to stereotype, I always end up making one general idea after another. I do believe that not every guy is the same. And I also believe that, they may take different route, but the orbit is still the same. Hehe. Anyway, I’ve met the shy ones, the brave ones, the empty vessels, the loud speakers, the brains, the brainless and the list would go on and on.

Unconsciously, I start to develop another list - the wish list of the traits that a man HAS to posses before I can start dating him. And yes, you guess it right. I crossed out one guy after another when he fails to score in my wish list.

After a while, I realized that the wish list is never an issue. I’ve met guys that have almost perfect score, but I hardly glance at them. And it isn’t a matter of good look as well. They may get me glancing at them, twice or thrice but I can assure you that the glances do not last more than 10 seconds.

Because in the end of the day, it goes straight down through your throat and stop at your heart. There. The heart. The heart is where everything matters.

What about him that makes me go crazy? He is not more than just a normal acquaintance when we first know each other. Then, things well, get clicked. And we get closer. Then is when I start to know him. Bit by bit. And the way he treats me- let me just put it this way; I found his acts are very masculine. He completes me in a way that I start to realize that I do (like any other people in the entire universe) have missing pieces. He is hard to be interpreted but easy to be read. And he reminds me of my father. He cares about my heart. He cares about my health. He cares about aurat and my solah. Just like what my father always does.

My best friend used to ask me, what is it that you see in him? And I will answer, not his look. Not his wealth. Not his brain. But his charm, that is what keeps me going. And the mystery, that is what keeps me wondering. Haha. Cheesy right? I myself can’t believe that I said that.

So, I am more than willing to ride the roller coaster, feel the thrill, feel sick and feel excited just because he is the one who broke the wall that once used to be a fort in my heart. He is the only one guy (apart from my daddy) that I will never say NO to.